


Their Eldest

by XinaV



Category: GOT7
Genre: 6+1, Gen, I love Mark Tuan, I wrote this to write their bond tho, Mark Tuan-centric, Mark is the best elder, Mark takes care of his group, No Romance, The most Mark has ever talked in both irl and in a story lol, They return the favor, Wholesome Friendship, he deserves love, whatsoever
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-26
Updated: 2020-02-26
Packaged: 2021-02-27 21:08:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,039
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22902208
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/XinaV/pseuds/XinaV
Summary: It was a reoccurring joke that Mark was really the maknae of the group and honestly, it wasn't that far off from the truth. But when times call for it, Mark proves to be the best elder they could possibly have.Or six times Mark was there for his dongsaengs and one time they were there for their eldest.
Comments: 8
Kudos: 149
Collections: Got7_Wild_Children





	Their Eldest

**Author's Note:**

> Hi, thank you for reading this. I wanted to write a story that not only shows how GOT7 has each others' backs but in particular, how Mark looks out for his fellow members. He's quiet and under the radar a lot of the time but we all know he looks out for the others. And they look out for him. This story is for that. So I hope you enjoy!

**I**

It was a particularly harsh article.

Jaebeom knew this type of stuff would always come up but this article hit a bit too close to home for him.

**_Comparing_** **_KPop Boy Group Idol Leaders—From the Best (BTS) to the Worst (GOT7)_**

Someone made an entire article comparing group leaders and there he was, the very last on the list. The whole thing is all over Twitter, Instagram, and everywhere else. Countless people have already seen it—some arguing strongly against the choices while others agreed wholeheartedly.

Normally this type of stuff wouldn’t bother him; there will always be haters in this line of work. Usually, he wouldn’t even bat an eye at this type of article and keep it moving. But this time he couldn’t help but give in to the voice telling him to see why it was becoming so popular so fast.

It was no surprise that the author of the article put BTS Namjoon first as the best. He is a pretty damn great leader and has worked hard over the years so that choice wasn’t very surprising. He also wasn’t surprised to see someone like NCT Taeyong or EXO Suho high up on the list either, the two well deserving of that credit. But him being the very last on the list? Now that did something.

Ranging from how slow he always is to how he can’t even control “Chaos7”, it was a long paragraph about why he was one of the worst leaders currently. The author even went as far as to say, “What does he even do? He can barely get the opening greeting right. What good is he to them as a leader?” It was a very spirited and opinionated paragraph about him.

And to add to it, the comments were a mess. Some argued on his behalf, saying he was a great leader. Others though agreed that he was a terrible leader and it is still unclear after all of this time why he was chosen to be GOT7’s leader. He never knew that so many people thought he was unfit to be a leader.

His thoughts took off from there. Was it true? Was he really such a horrible leader? If so many people could agree with that idea then he must be doing something wrong. Do his members think that too? Do they think he’s a terrible leader but none of them said it to his face yet?

He doesn’t like to lack confidence in himself, especially when it comes to his group, but for whatever reason, he just can’t stop his thoughts from running wild this time.

Luckily for him though, his thoughts are interrupted by a knock on the door.

Mark peeks his head in to show that it’s just him before entering fully.

“I thought you went home already?” Jaebeom says, confused to see the elder still here.

They were set free for the day and he knows Mark was one of the main ones who were dying to go home, tiredness written on his face. To see him still here is a surprise.

Mark goes over and joins him on the sofa with a knowing look in his eyes.

“I wanted to check on you first,” he replies.

Jaebeom’s confusion only grows at the response.

“For what? I’m fine,” he says.

Mark gestures with his head to Jaebeom’s phone before raising his own as well. He frowns slightly as he begins to speak.

“I know you were reading that article, I saw it on your screen on the way to the room when you were switching tabs,” he says.

That’s the thing with Mark. He may be quiet the majority of the time but he’s extremely observant. He catches things easily, even the little stuff.

“I just accidentally clicked on it that’s all. It’s nothing, you didn’t have to stay back for that,” Jaebeom says, trying to brush the matter off.

He doesn’t want to worry Mark, even if that article does seem to be a bit more than “nothing” to him.

Mark isn’t having that though, frown deepening.

“Don’t lie to me, Beommie, we both know that isn’t true,” he says, his tone not harsh but firm enough to call out Jaebeom’s lies.

Mark may not be the best liar himself but he has the scary talent of being able to catch and call out lies. No doubt it comes from him being so observative but either way, it’s a scary skill.

Jaebeom gives Mark a fraction of a smile as a peace offering for getting caught lying. Mark’s expression doesn’t change, however, the older still patiently waiting for the truth.

It only takes a few seconds of Mark patiently waiting him out to break Jaebeom’s resolve. His shoulders slump slightly as his tiny smile falls. He sighs.

“Alright, yes I did read it but really, you didn’t have to stay back for that. It was just some random person spitting out their opinions that’s all,” he says.

“Objectively speaking, yeah it was but was it really that way for  _ you _ ?” Mark responds.

Somehow, Jaebeom can tell that Mark already knows the answer to that question. Mark won’t accept a lie and he knows it.

Part of him doesn’t want to talk about it though. Wouldn’t that be like throwing his problems on him—something his members should be doing to him not the other way around. Good leaders know how to handle problems, including their own.

But also, there’s something comforting about talking to Mark. Maybe it’s because you know he’s listening to you carefully and not going to interrupt you. Whatever it is, it makes it feel nice and safe to open up to him.

That’s the side Jaebeom ends up listening to.

He doesn’t meet Mark in his eyes anymore, rare shyness creeping up on him.

“Do...do you think I’m a bad leader too?” He asks instead of answering the question straight out.

Emotion floods Mark’s eyes and he puts a hand on Jaebeom’s leg.

“No, I don’t think that at all. You’re an amazing leader,” Mark replies.

“But so many people do. Are you sure there isn’t something wrong with the way I lead or something? What if the others think I’m a bad leader but just haven’t said it yet? What then?” He says, worries finding their way out of his mouth easier than ever.

And just like that, it’s out. What he was avoiding saying only a bit ago is now out in the air between the two of them.

He doesn’t know why, but some cruel part of him thought that Mark would laugh and be like ‘yeah you’re terrible’ now that he doubted Mark’s statement. Part of him just expected everything to take that turn and his doubts would be confirmed. He finds himself preparing for it.

Which is why he is quietly surprised when he feels a finger gently tap his chin.

Mark lowers his head a bit, trying to get Jaebeom to look at him. He turns the younger’s head toward him but waits patiently for Jaebeom to meet his eyes on his own.

Jaebeom decides to do so. The second he does, a sense of warmth rushes to him as he sees the kind and honest look in Mark’s eyes.

“None of us think you’re a bad leader and we never did. Honestly, none of us could be leader other than you. The only thing that article got right about you is that you are the leader of Chaos7 and trust me when I say none of us can handle that other than you,” Mark says.

“Jinyoung and you seem to do a pretty good job when times call for it,” Jaebeom responds, looking away slightly.

But Mark moves his head again so they can maintain eye contact.

“Jinyoung can only put up with us so much. He watches over us yes—and I know he could step up if he really had to—but he can’t replace you as leader. As for me, I’m a bit too old to deal with these kids and far too quiet. My place as the oldest is as far as ‘authority’ goes for me. I definitely could not replace you as our leader. You’re unique,” Mark says.

The words are comforting—more comforting than Jaebeom imagined they could ever be. For some reason, hearing Mark tell him that he couldn’t be replaced makes him feel comfort he didn’t know was possible.

“You were chosen as our leader for a reason, it wasn’t by chance. Try not to forget that. And remember, not everyone can put up with the pure wildness that is GOT7. Even some of our own staff gave up before. I say you’re doing pretty good if you haven’t torn out your hair yet and we haven’t lost a member. Give yourself more credit. That author literally was saying nothing but lies and it’s only popular right now because everyone loves drama. What they’re saying about you isn’t true, has never been true, and will never be true. Okay?” Mark says.

The comment gets Jaebeom to chuckle a bit as he thinks about some of the staff who just couldn’t anymore. He guesses they are a handful at times. And yeah, there is that risk one of them is going to end up in the hospital one day for something stupid they do but it hasn’t happened yet so that’s something to be happy about.

Maybe, just maybe, Mark has a point.

“Okay,” Jaebeom nods, a small smile on his face.

It’s only one word but the two of them know that it means a lot more than it sounds.

Mark grins in return. And just like that, everything feels normal again.

“Good. Now I’m going to head home but call me if you need me. Make sure you go home soon as well or at least join what remains of our group outside,” he says.

He stands up, playfully nudging the younger.

“I‘ll go see whatever chaos is happening out there soon,” Jaebeom responds.

Mark chuckles.

“Good. See you tomorrow,” he says.

He walks to the door and opens it, walking out. 

“Hey,” Jaebeom calls out.

Mark stops midway and looks over his shoulder back toward him.

“Thanks, hyung,” Jaebeom says.

“Anytime,  _ leader _ ,” Mark responds, throwing in title with a smile.

He continues on, pulling the door closed behind him.

Jaebeom looks at the closed door with a smile.

Eldest Mark comes in for the save once again. He said he’s too old to deal with them all but Jaebeom knows for a fact that they’d be lost in their own little way without Mark around. That eldest role is pretty important to them.

Mark is pretty important to them.

* * *

  
  


**II**

It was no secret that Jackson Wang does not rest properly.

His friends knew it, their management knew it, their fans knew it, hell that one host from America who barely knew what to call them knew it. Everyone knew that rest and Jackson were starting to become like the North and South pole—never to meet. That man just worked nonstop.

Many people have tried to get Jackson to stop working and go to sleep. Ahgases constantly tell him to get some rest whenever he posts something at an unusually early or late time of day. His own management team drops hints that he needs to get some rest—which should really say something to him—especially when it has been a long day. His other idols friends tell him to rest whenever they get the chance to talk because, again, everyone knows that he doesn’t. Many people have tried to get it through his head the importance of rest but there’s only so far you can get with him sometimes.

Which leads to now.

2:47 in the morning and Jackson is still at the computer—he hasn’t left that studio for who knows how long. In his (pitiful and invalid) defense, he didn’t realize it was that late. He was just so immersed in what he was doing that time flew by him. And without any intervention, it would continue to fly by him.

Thankfully, intervention came in the form of Mark Tuan.

The studio door opens and Jackson turns around, startled at the sound. He relaxes a bit when he sees it’s only Mark—he forgot that the elder has a copy of the key—but then becomes confused at his presence.

“What are you doing here, hyung?” Jackson asks.

He doesn’t know what time it is but he knows it’s late considering how quiet it is. Mark is barefaced, in sweatpants and a hoodie underneath his jacket, and a beanie over his messy hair; signs that it is well past the hours of anyone seeing them.

“I’m here to bring you home,” Mark says.

“Home? I appreciate the gesture but I know how to get home by myself. You didn’t have to come out,” Jackson says with a chuckle.

He doesn’t see why Mark would see the need to come take him home all of a sudden. Besides, he still has a bit more to finish up before he can go.

“It’s nearing 3 in the morning, Gaga, you need to sleep,” Mark says.

Jackson’s eyes widen a bit and he checks his phone. Sure enough, Mark is telling the truth—3 AM is approaching them soon. Man, time really did pass him by.

“What are you doing here then at this time? Shouldn’t you be asleep?” Jackson says, looking back at Mark.

Mark chuckles at the irony of the statement—typical Jackson.

“Yeah, I should and so should you. I told you, I’m here to take you home,” he responds.

“But how did you know I was even here?” Jackson says.

He well knows that Mark went to bed much earlier so how did the elder end up here?

“I told you to text me when you got in, remember? I did end up falling asleep but I woke up for some reason and saw that you still didn’t text me. Considering that you’d never forget to do that, I figured that you were still here so I came to get you,” Mark explains.

Jackson internally winces as he remembers Mark telling him that. Mark needed him to find something which is why he was asked to text when he got inside so Mark could know. He remembers telling himself to finish up quickly so he can go find that thing for Mark but once again, time flew past him.

“I’m sorry, I don’t know how I forgot about that. I’ll find it first thing once I get in,” Jackson says, genuinely apologetic.

“No, you’re going to go to bed when you go home; look for it tomorrow. You need to sleep,” Mark responds.

There goes the concept of rest slipping Jackson’s mind again. Seriously, it’s a wonder how he doesn’t pass out or land himself in a hospital.

“Okay, okay, I’ll look for it tomorrow. Now go back home, you need to sleep too,” Jackson says.

He feels bad that Mark was asleep but now is here. He really hopes the older can fall back asleep easily when he gets back in.

“Alright, so let’s go. You don’t even have your coat on or anything,” Mark says.

It takes Jackson a second to realize that Mark is still alluding to the fact that he came to bring him home.

“No no, don’t wait for me. I have to finish this real quick and then I’ll go,” he says, not wanting to keep Mark waiting for him.

Mark deadpans.

“What part of almost 3 o’clock in the morning did you not understand Jack? You’re leaving now and I’m here to drive you. I know for a fact you didn’t drive here so come on,” he replies.

“But I—”

“No buts. You’re going home now. You can either come willingly or we can drag this out, I still take you home, and then keep you locked in your house for the entire day tomorrow with the help of the guys. Your choice,” Mark says, stopping any excuse Jackson could have made.

Jackson knows very well that Mark’s threat is more than just a threat. If anyone can keep him locked up in his house, it’s Mark. And once he has the help of Jaebeom and Jinyoung, it’s over for him. He won’t be able to step foot outside.

He sighs, knowing that this is not a battle he’ll win.

“Alright, you win. Let me make sure everything is saved and then we can go,” he says.

Mark smiles in response, glad to see that Jackson is cooperating.

Jackson turns back to the computer, triple-checking that everything is saved. Once he’s sure, he powers down the computer and then stands up. His body is basically screaming as he stretches but he won’t mention that or otherwise, Mark would probably allow Jinyoung to go ahead with his plan of sending someone to monitor him here.

He grabs his coat and throws it on quickly, not wasting any more time. Mark walks out of the room and Jackson follows after him, locking the door behind them. They leave the empty building and hop into Mark’s car. Mark starts the car and off they go.

Jackson didn’t realize how tired he actually was until he was sitting in the passenger seat doing nothing for a good two minutes. His body grows a bit heavy and his eyes start to droop on their own. Due to it being late, the roads aren’t crowded so it’s a smooth drive—the motion of the car putting him to sleep more.

Mark glances over to Jackson and a small smile touches his face.

“Yah, I knew you were tired,” he says softly, shaking his head at Jackson’s already sleeping self.

Jackson is always working but never realizes how tired he is. What are they going to do with him?

Mark looks back to the road, smile still on his face as he continues to drive. He’ll let Jackson sleep for the ride home.

“Sweet dreams Gaga.”

* * *

  
  


**III**

If you had to assign someone in GOT7 the role of group mother, Park Jinyoung would get that title.

Responsible, attentive, quite honestly done with everything Jinyoung.

Jaebeom may be the leader but Jinyoung takes care of them all a lot. He constantly tells the maknae line when to chill out—until he’s on the verge of strangling one of them, if not all, and someone else has to step in. He makes sure they’re all on schedule. He gives a listening ear to them and also settles disputes. He makes sure they’re presentable even after the stylists do their jobs. Park Jinyoung is just the group’s mother.

The fans say it all the time—who knows how many “Park Jinyoung being GOT7's mom for 10 minutes” (or something similar) the fandom has made—and the group themselves say it as well. Jinyoung even has the mother death glare down packed, constantly giving that look to BamBam and Yugyeom. He is just a certified group mother, every KPop group having one.

What would they do without Jinyoung? A bunch more reckless stuff but that’s beside the point. They’d be missing a crucial role and would no doubt have a lot more issues. Though they get on his nerves to no bitter end, they still really care for him and he cares for them too (though, he really wants to throttle Yugyeom sometimes). Yes, Jinyoung is a major factor in their group’s functionality.

So when he came down with the flu, everyone was surprised.

It was rare for Jinyoung to get sick, he took care of himself pretty darn well. He was usually the person helping the sick to get better, not the one sick. BamBam and Jackson even had their dramatic moment, exclaiming that he was leaving them on this Earth and going home—to then was stated to be Hell which got them a swift kick despite his weakness—because there was no way that Jinyoung of all people, caught the flu. But he did and he was down for the count.

Jinyoung hated being sick. He hated having to stay in bed and not do anything when his schedule is filled enough. Once things get pushed back then he knows he’ll never see a moment’s rest again. Not to mention that he feels like he’s missing out on things when he’s sick, such as his friends getting together off-hours or yet another crazy incident at work caused by none other than his fellow members. He didn’t fight against resting—he knew he had to rest if he wanted to get better sooner—but let it be known loud and clear that he can’t stand being sick.

He just had to catch the flu, didn’t he?

Right now, he’s in his living room, laying down on the couch. He’s so tired of being in bed all day so he decided to compromise with himself and go rest in the living room. At least then he’ll see a different set of walls.

He rises in curiosity when the bell rings.

Weakly pushing himself up and off the couch, he sluggishly walks over to the door—blanket wrapped around his shoulders—pressing the intercom.

“Who is it?” He asks, nose congested making it very hard for him to breathe let alone speak.

“It’s me Jinyoungie.”

Jinyoung easily recognizes the voice as Mark’s and lets him in. He doesn’t remember Mark saying he would come over today though.

Mark walks in, bag in his hand as he closes and locks the door behind him.

“Mark hyung, what are you doing here?” Jinyoung asks.

Mark turns to him and even with the face mask on, Jinyoung knows the older smiled.

“I’m checking in on you. Let’s get you seated first though,” Mark says.

Jinyoung complies and they both head to the living room, Jinyoung all but dropping down onto the couch.

“How are you today, better or worse? Have you been taking your medicine?” Mark inquires.

Jinyoung does a so-so motion before pulling the blanket around his shoulders closer to him.

“I feel equally as terrible I think. I’ve been taking the medicine but I don’t feel any major difference yet. I’m freezing though,” he responds.

Mark makes a hmm sound as he looks over the younger with his eyes.  He’s still lacking some color and he looks absolutely drained but nothing too alarming can be said otherwise.

“Did you eat lunch yet?” Mark asks.

Jinyoung shakes his head no. He told himself to go eat something but that meant getting up and at the time, that was not what he wanted to do.

“Well then I came at the right time. I made you some soup—I asked my mom for the recipe. It will not only warm you up but it should help you feel a bit better,” Mark says.

If Jinyoung had the energy in him, he would have looked really surprised and touched all at the same time. Mark made him soup? That is so thoughtful of him.

“Hyung, you didn’t have to, that’s so nice of you. Thank you,” Jinyoung says, a weak smile appearing.

Mark waves it off casually.

“It was no problem, I just want to help you get better. You do the same for all of us so it’s time to return the favor,” he says.

He says that but Jinyoung knows it’s more than just returning the favor. Mark is just that kind of an elder to go out of his way and do this for one of them.

“Would you like to eat now or later? Are you nauseous?” Mark asks.

Jinyoung feels a bit better already from Mark’s thoughtfulness alone. He is just so touched that Mark would go out of his way and  _ make _ soup for him—not buy soup—and bring it here. He messes with the group a lot but Jinyoung will be the first to tell you that all of his friends are honest-to-God angels overall.

“I’m not nauseous, I can eat now. Thank you so much,” he responds.

Once again, he can tell that Mark smiled underneath his mask.

“You’re welcome, Jinyoungie. Let me put some in a bowl for you, wait here,” Mark says.

He goes to the kitchen with the bag he came in with and grabs a bowl. He takes out the container of soup he made and opens it. Happy it’s still nice and hot, he pours some of it into the bowl, closing it back up and putting the rest into the refrigerator. He puts a spoon in the bowl and heads back to the living room with it.

Gently, he places the bowl on the table in front of Jinyoung.

“I put the rest in the fridge if you want to eat some later. I hope this is edible enough for you,” Mark says, a joking tone coming into his voice.

Jinyoung half chuckles half coughs in response.

“Thank you. If Mama Tuan gave you the recipe then I’m sure it’s more than just edible,” he replies.

He decides to lower himself to the floor so he can be at the proper sitting height for eating—he does not want to accidentally burn himself or spill the soup. Once he’s on the floor, he grabs the spoon and takes his first sip of the soup.

He can tell that Mark put his heart into it just from one sip.

“Wow hyung, this is really good. Really, thank you so much for this,” he says.

Mark lifts his cap up and runs his hand through his hair before putting back on the hat.

“Again, it was no problem. I’m glad you like it,” he responds.

They sit and talk for a bit while Jinyoung eats the soup. When he’s done, Mark takes the bowl back to the kitchen and washes it. He makes sure to leave it in an easy to reach place so whenever Jinyoung gets up to eat anything, it doesn’t become a task.

He goes back to the living room and sees Jinyoung’s eyes half-closed.

“Hey, I’m going to get going now. You should go to bed and take a nap,” Mark says.

Jinyoung stirs alert and nods, standing up to let Mark out.

When they’re at the door, Mark turns to him.

“Call me if you need anything. I’m heading over to get Jackson and BamBam so it won’t take me too long to get back here,” he says.

Jinyoung smiles once again, eternally grateful for how kind Mark is.

“I will. If anything, I’ll wake Jaebeom up and force him to come over,” he responds.

Mark chuckles, knowing very well that Jinyoung would do such a thing.

“Alright, whatever works best. Feel better Jinyoungie,” he says.

He waves goodbye and leaves the house. Jinyoung closes the door and heads back, this time heading to his bedroom with a smile.

He may be the mother of the group but Mark Tuan is definitely their helper angel.

* * *

  
  


**IV**

Youngjae struggled with English sometimes.

When you have so many people in your group that are fluent in English—a Native speaker being one of them—you don’t have to worry too much about it. They can either do most of the speaking or just translate. GOT7 has it pretty easy when it comes to talking in English or understanding English.

That doesn’t mean that the non-English speakers can’t practice their English though. It’s good if they get better at speaking the little English they do know so they don’t always have to rely on one of their members.

So that’s what Youngjae has been trying to do.

He’s been trying to improve his English so when it’s time for interviews and world tours, he can say a bit more to people all on his own. He wants to have a bit more confidence in what he can say and then switch to Korean afterward.

It’s a bit of a struggle though.

Translating his ideas into English is a challenge before he even gets into pronunciation. When he thinks he translated it correctly and checks it over, oftentimes there are a few errors. Or when he wants to pronounce a word and tries to listen to the audio of it, he just doesn’t catch it sometimes or understands the sounds that were just made. He’s especially having trouble with the letters that are in a word but absolutely make no sound or do not make the sound they normally do. Now that’s confusing.

He’s going to get it one way or another, right? If he sticks to it, then he’s going to eventually get it.

He tells himself this as he stares frustratedly at his book in front of him.

At this point, he doesn’t even know where to start and he’s sure that’s the frustration talking. All he sees are the Korean sentences he wants to translate and the blank lines under it. He’s just staring at the characters, not even seeing a glimpse of the English words in his head. At this point, he’s seeing Japanese and he believes that’s his brain trying to avoid work.

He’s so into staring at his work that he doesn’t hear a person enter the room until they take a seat next to him. He jumps up slightly, startled.

“Woah, didn’t mean to scare you.”

Youngjae turns and sees Mark sitting next to him. He must have finished recording his lines already.

“No, it’s okay, I just wasn’t paying attention for a moment there,” Youngjae responds.

Mark offers a smile before looking down at the book on the younger’s lap.

“What’s got you pouting?” Mark asks.

Youngjae looks down at his book, frustration still nibbling at him as he sees the lack of progress made on the paper.

“I’m trying to work on my English but my brain doesn’t even want to begin helping me out,” he responds.

Mark looks over the sentences on the page and internally he smiles, knowing that this is so he can talk to the fans better when they go to America soon. The effort warms his heart.

“I can help you. I should be done for the day so I have time,” he says.

Youngjae’s mind belatedly—extremely belated—remembers that Mark is their native English speaker here so if anyone can help him, it’s definitely Mark.

His face lights up and he grins brightly.

“You can? Oh that would be so great! Thank you hyung,” he says.

Mark chuckles, nodding his head. Youngjae’s happiness is contagious as always so he can’t help but be happy too.

“It’s no problem. Let’s see what you were trying to do,” he responds.

Youngjae lifts up the notebook to show Mark.

“I’m trying to write these into English and then say them,” he says.

“Well then, let’s take it one sentence at a time and see how far we can get,” Mark replies.

And that’s how they get started.

Taking their time, they go through each written sentence, Mark guiding Youngjae to the right answer and only outright telling him when necessary. He has Youngjae write the sentences in English as practice and to help commit them to memory. Once they do that, they practice practicing saying the sentences.

And they make very good progress.

“Good, now say the full thing to me,” Mark says in English.

Youngjae nods, feeling confident that he can do it.

“Thank you so much for supporting us tonight, it means a lot. I am happy that I could be here in front of you and spend this moment together,” he says in English.

Mark claps in proud excitement.

“That was great! I knew you could do it,” he says, switching back to Korean.

Relief, excitement, and every joyous emotion in between fills Youngjae’s face and he practically throws himself on Mark, squeezing the elder in a hug.

“Oh thank you so much hyung! You’re so awesome,” he says.

Mark laughs in response but returns the embrace all the same. He’s happy that Youngjae was able to do it and really the younger did most of the work. He knew he could get it.

“I was just a coach of sorts, you did all the real work. Good job. Keep up the practice and you’ll be out talking Bam in no time,” Mark responds.

It’s Youngjae’s turn to laugh now.

“I don’t think anyone can out-talk him,” he jokes through his laughter.

Mark laughs along, agreeing that their Thai member can talk a lot in any language he uses.

Youngjae feels the warmth in him rise as he and Mark joke around. Despite always sticking to the sides and staying quiet, Mark always does step up to the plate when it comes to helping them out. He’s so happy that they have an eldest like that.

He hugs Mark tighter, hoping he can get across his appreciation through the gesture.

Mark is the greatest sometimes.

* * *

  
  


**V**

Homesickness is no foreign thing to BamBam.

He well knows the feeling of missing home and everything about it. He knows all foreigners know it better than anything, especially idols that are on any group’s foreign line. Homesickness is a common thing for them.

When he first came here and first debuted, BamBam felt homesick a lot more frequently. With all the nerve-tangling activities of learning a new language, getting used to and living with new people, and debuting for the world to know, missing home only seemed to make sense for him. He wanted his mother’s embrace to comfort him and her sweet words to remind him that he could do it but his mother was back in Thailand. Therefore, the homesickness began. Heck, even after the petty fights and arguments he got into with his new members eventually made him miss home where he was understood. Having a laptop thrown at you can surprisingly make you want to go home—extra sarcasm on surprisingly.

As time went along, however, the moments where he was longing for home lessened. He was understanding Korean better, his members and him were becoming closer, they were growing in popularity, and things seemed to become more fun and enjoyable. Things were smoothening out which gave him less to worry about and fewer chances to miss home. He did miss home every now and again but it wasn’t as often as before.

But if there was one thing BamBam had to say never changed it’s the fact that he can always tell when it was beginning to creep up on him.

It would start as just nothing. Literally nothing. He would feel this nothingness creep into him. It was cold and uncomfortable, making him squirm in his seat. Then it would become a jittery feeling as if he just couldn’t sit still. He didn’t want to do anything but he didn’t and couldn’t sit still. He would then begin to compare things to how it was back home or think about his last stop home.

And then soon enough, he was feeling homesick. It was a process, sometimes fast, sometimes slow, but it always ended with the same result. Him missing home.

BamBam sighs as he stares at a picture of him and his mom from the last time he was in Thailand.

He misses her. He misses seeing her face to face, talking to her, taking her shopping, eating her food; he just misses his mom. He loves performing back home and being able to share the experience with the fans but really, the best part about a concert stop in Thailand is being able to see his mom again. He loves spending any open time he can get to just have fun with his mom.

But he won’t be back in Thailand for any reason anytime soon.

He knows that in a few days, he won’t feel so down and that he’ll be able to pick himself out of this funk but right now, he just misses home more than anything.

_ Knock knock knock _

BamBam turns to as he hears his door being opened.

Mark steps in the room, still taking off his coat.

BamBam forgot that they’re all having movie night here tonight and that Mark agreed to help set up. He forgot he gave Mark a key just in case he wasn’t here for whatever reason. It’s definitely too late to cancel everything but he doesn’t know if he’s up for company tonight.

“Hey Bam, you okay?” Mark asks.

He walks over and sits down next to BamBam on the bed. He puts a comforting hand over BamBam’s hand, giving it a supportive squeeze.

BamBam looks up at Mark and immediately the older can tell what’s wrong by the look in his eyes. Mark looks that way sometimes too, you know.

“Oh Bammie, it’s alright,” he says, pulling BamBam into a hug.

BamBam doesn’t fight the embrace. No, instead, he falls into it, letting himself bury his head into Mark’s neck.

“I miss being home, hyung,” BamBam says, his voice already threatening to crack.

Mark nods, rubbing BamBam’s back softly to comfort the younger.

“I know, I understand,” he says.

It’s not Mark’s first time seeing BamBam homesick. He almost always notices when either he or Jackson seem to have that look in their eyes and that slump in their shoulders. Being homesick is exactly how it sounds, you’re sick and that’s never fun. He knows how hard it is so he always tries to be there for either of them when it happens.

“It’s okay to miss home you know. I miss home too, despite how much I like Korea. You aren’t alone, I understand,” Mark reassures.

One thing about homesickness is that sometimes you may feel like your love of your new home faded away or that you’re wrong for missing the place you left. It’s hard to explain but yet, once you feel it, you’d understand it from a mile away. Mark understands how BamBam feels.

“I want to go home,” BamBam says.

“And we’ll find some time for you to soon, okay? You’ll be home again before you know it. But until then, let’s take your mind off of it, yeah? I can call everyone and tell them you don’t feel so well so we have to cancel if you would like. Then you and I can stay in and do whatever you want and order whatever you feel like having. Do you want that?” Mark responds.

BamBam thinks about the proposal. Canceling sounds really good right about now. But he also knows that being around all his friends can help pick up his mood and that it’s been a while since they’ve had a night just for the seven of them. It’d be mean to cancel now.

“No, we don’t have to cancel,” he says.

“Alright, then how about you and I go run to the store and buy all of your favorite snacks and then come back to set up? I think some fresh air would be nice,” Mark suggests.

The guys shouldn’t be here until a few hours later so they do have time to do that. And it has been a while since he and Mark did a grocery run with just the two of them. Maybe it’s time for them to do so.

“Okay, let’s do that,” BamBam agrees.

He lingers in Mark’s embrace for a bit longer though and the elder allows him to. When he’s finally ready to get up, that’s when he moves back. He meets Mark’s eyes and Mark gives him a comforting smile.

“Ready to go?” Mark asks.

BamBam nods. It’s time to get his mind off of home for a bit.

“Good, then let’s go. We have a store to empty,” Mark jokes.

It succeeds in getting BamBam to chuckle—mainly because it’s true—and Mark feels proud of himself. Hopefully, by the end of the night, BamBam will feel much better than he does now.

He’s going to help BamBam through this one step at a time. Just like always.

* * *

  
  


**VI**

There are many reasons why Yugyeom doesn’t like to live alone. But a lot of it can be summed up into two words.

Comfort and safety.

It’s why he loves when they have sleepovers at each other’s houses, why he didn’t mind living in the dorms, and why he never fights for the single room when they’re traveling. He doesn’t mind sharing a space with someone. In fact, he wants to share the space. Please give him someone to room with.

He especially likes it when they’re on tour, in a foreign country, far away from home. He feels at ease when he has a roommate in the hotel, making things a lot easier for him. It reminds him that he’s not doing this alone and that someone has his back—six people have his back actually.

And though he knows he’s not supposed to technically have favorites, he does have a favorite hyung he likes to room with.

Mark.

Mark is easy going and not really a hassle for a roommate. Though he’s quiet, his presence can still be felt and things just feel a lot more peaceful. As long as he has a bunch of pillows on his bed, you don’t even realize that he’s asleep. Jackson always used to joke that rooming with Mark is like rooming by yourself but Yugyeom never thought that.

To him, rooming with Mark meant a silent but noticeable feeling of peace, comfort, and safety.

He loved rooming with Mark.

Tonight made him love it even more.

He tossed and turned, whimpers coming out of his mouth as fear rose in him. His legs were kicking under the blanket while his arms were pulled in to him. His heart was racing and his face wrinkled up in stress and fear. His eyes were tightly shut as if to block something out when in actuality it was trapping him in.

He was having a nightmare. A bad one at that.

More whimpers escaped his mouth—some sounding like cries while others sounded like pleads.

He can’t escape his nightmare.

“—eom—”

“—gyeom—”

“—gyeom wake—”

“Yugyeom wake up!”

A rough shake does the trick and Yugyeom flies up ramrod straight in the bed. Hands seem to frantically grab him and in a panic, he tries to pull away.

“No, no Gyeommie, it’s just me. It’s just hyung.”

Yugyeom turns to the voice alarmingly fast and once again hands are on him, this time holding his cheeks.

“Hey hey hey, it’s just me. Come on, look at me, I’m right here.”

Yugyeom tries to focus his eyes on the person in front of him, the person cupping his face. It takes a minute since his vision shakes with each pounding beat of his heart but eventually, he’s able to see who’s talking to him.

Mark.

Mark gently rubs his thumbs on Yugyeom’s cheeks with soft shushes, trying to calm down the younger.

“That’s it, look at me. Hyung’s here, I’m here for you,” Mark says.

Yugyeom’s body shakes in fear and adrenaline but he can hear the calm lilt to Mark’s voice, just waiting to reach him. It has the power to slow down the speed of this room.

“Deep breaths, Yugyeom-ah, take deep breaths for me please,” Mark continues.

For the sake of the elder, Yugyeom finds himself attempting to breathe. It feels like he’s fighting against his lungs by trying to do so but he does it nonetheless.

“You’re doing great. Keep taking deep breaths for me.”

In and out, Yugyeom forces himself to breathe. Eventually, the process becomes less of a forceful thing and more of a natural thing. Soon enough, he can start breathing on his own again.

“Great job Gyeommie, I’m proud of you,” Mark praises.

He slowly lets go of Yugeom’s face and places his hands in the younger’s lap. He holds the younger’s hands, rubbing circles on to the back of Yugyeom’s hand with his thumbs.

“Did you have a nightmare?” Mark asks.

Shakily, Yugeyom nods his head yes. And what a nightmare it was.

“Do you want to tell me what it was or no?” Mark questions.

Yugyeom thinks about it for a second before shaking his head no. He’s not quite ready to go through that again.

“Alright, that’s fine. You’re fine, you’re safe,” Mark says, noticing the tremble still in the younger’s hands.

He squeezes them gently, silently saying that he’s there for him.

“Do you want hyung to share the bed with you?” He asks.

Yugyeom nods, the quickest decision he has made so far.

Without a word, Mark gestures for him to move over as he climbs on the bed. He tries to get comfortable as quickly as possible before opening his arms for the younger. Despite Yugyeom being bigger than him, the younger finds a way to bury his head into his chest, seeking comfort.

Mark holds him, running a hand through his hair is a soothing motion. He begins to hum a song as he does so.

Yugyeom releases a shaky breath as he settles down into Mark’s consoling embrace. His mind begins to find the two things it always looks for when it comes to rooming.

Comfort and safety.

He holds on to Mark tightly as the two feelings wash over him.

Their eldest Mark, who provides comfort and security.

* * *

  
  


**\+ I**

Mark was tired.

But not the normal kind of tired. It wasn’t as if he wanted to go to sleep or anything like that, no he wasn’t that kind of tired. He was a completely different type of tired that has been weighing on him for a while.

He was tired of being.

He was tired of having to be a person and go about life. Tired of the routines and tired of the spontaneous additions. Tired of getting out of bed and tired of going to bed. He was just tired.

All he wanted to do was go somewhere far away from people and just sit. You know, exist while not existing, all at the same time. He just wanted to pause life for a moment, deal with nothing, and then when he felt better, continue on with everything. Don’t get it confused, Mark isn’t saying he didn’t want to live anymore. No, he’s just simply saying that he wanted to pause life. He could and wants to continue it but for right now, he just wants to do nothing without there being consequences to doing nothing.

Not having to worry about eating or drinking, interacting with people, waking up or going to sleep; none of that stuff. Just sit there and exist away from the stuff that comes along with existing.

But he can’t do that.

As a person with a regular job, he wouldn’t be able to do that. So him being an idol? Forget it. He can barely hide away from the world in his own home so he definitely can’t try to achieve that “exist but don’t” idea he has. His schedule doesn’t allow for that. Their fans don’t allow for that. Heck, his own friends don’t allow for that. No matter what, he’ll always be around people and will always have to do something. He can’t escape it.

He’s so tired though.

But thinking about that will do him no justice. It will only make him more tired and then it will really start to show. He has to keep it under wraps so things go smoothly. If it starts to show then people are going to start to ask questions and that’s even more added to him. No, he won’t think about it and will just keep on moving.

He has to keep on moving.

As the eldest of the group, he has six other people to look after. He has to watch for the subtle signs that appear when something is wrong with them. He can’t just take a break from that. As a member of the group in general, he has to play his part. He has to rap with vigor and passion, pull off all of his flips, and make sure he keeps up with the choreography. He can’t fall behind, if not for his own sake, for the sake of his group.

He has to keep moving.

Which is why he dragged himself to the practice room like he was supposed to.

He felt it in his bones the moment he woke up, today was going to be a hard day. His body was heavy, his head was cloudy, and his eyes burned. He wanted nothing more than to just stay under his blankets and do nothing but he knew he couldn’t. He knew that his phone would be ringing like crazy if he suddenly didn’t show up to practice. If he didn’t answer, then all six of his friends would be at his house, hovering over him to see what was wrong and that was the very last thing he wanted. He didn’t want to be around people but if he was going to be then it was going to be best for him if he went to them and not the other way around. He didn’t want his personal space invaded. With all that in mind, he knew he had to get out of the bed.

So he got up, got ready, and went to the practice room.

The second he got there though, he wanted to turn back around. 

BamBam and Yugyeom were talking loudly over something and their volume made his head pound. Then, when Jinyoung scolded them for being so loud—almost as loudly as them—Mark swore he saw colors in his eyes. Youngjae’s normally uplifting energy was too much for Mark to handle, making him feel even more drained. Jaebeom was already preparing everything for practice to start, reminding Mark that he just can’t stop, and that made his throat tighten a bit at the thought. And then, what was probably the worst, Jackson came over and gave his routine hug but the second his arms wrapped around him, Mark felt all of his nerves light up. He wanted to scream for Jackson to get off of him but he knew that would be mean and suspicious so he stayed there and suffered until Jackson finally let go.

And that was all before the actual practice started.

But that’s alright, he could make it through.

Right?

Wrong.

“Mark hyung, you messed up again,” BamBam innocently points out as the music stops.

Mark has never made this many mistakes in one practice in his entire career as an idol. He swears he’s trying his best but he still somehow ends up messing up. He’s trying to keep his mind focused but everything just feels so wrong.

Pins and needles, pricks and prickles, shocks and sparks; all of it runs through his veins nonstop. The more he moves, the higher their intensity. His lungs feel too small, not able to take in enough air as he dances. His stomach turns as if he was on a rollercoaster but then stops as if he had the wind knocked out of him. The lights hurt his head and he can barely feel the ground beneath him. His knees feel like they are going to give out on him at any moment. Everything just feels so wrong.

But he knows that he is physically okay. He knows that it’s all in his head. So he tries to push past it because he is okay. He just has to make it through this and then he can go home. But he keeps messing up. He keeps making mistakes.

He mumbles an apology for his error and mentally berates himself to just hold up a bit longer. Only a bit longer.

“Hyung, do you need a break? You seem kinda out of it,” Jinyoung says, looking over Mark.

No, because a break means he has to be here longer. He just wants to go home.

So he shakes his head no and gets back in his position. 

He’ll compromise with himself. If he gets through this one song without screwing up royally, he’ll allow himself to make up some excuse to convince them to let him go home early. He can work with that. That should be some good motivation for him.

Seeing that Mark probably isn’t going to listen if they suggest a break again, they get in their positions as well. They’re going to watch him closely though.

The music starts up again and they begin to dance.

Mark tries his very hardest to focus on the dance. All he has to do is complete this and he goes home. He just has to get to the end.

It doesn’t happen.

On one of the easier steps, Mark’s feet get caught up with one another and he takes a fall down to the ground, landing on his butt.

The music stops and everyone turns to him quickly to make sure he’s okay.

“Mark hyung?”

“Hyung are you alright?”

“Are you okay?”

“Hyung?”

They all call out to him, trying to make sure he’s good. It doesn’t look like it was a hard fall but he isn’t getting up nor responding so they’re concerned.

Mark, on the other hand, is completely out of it.

The voices touch his ears but none of it actually processes in his mind. He just sits there on the floor, staring at who knows what.

He messed up again. He messed up and ruined the choreography again. It was such a simple step, how could he have fallen?

He was so close to going home.

With that thought hitting him, things start to react.

His chest begins to tighten, feeling like there’s a boulder on him. His body begins to tremble, unable to keep itself still. His throat begins to close up, barely letting any air come in or leave. His vision blurs, making everything around become fuzzy shapes. His ears clog up, leaving him to feel like he’s drowning underwater.

And then he breaks.

It only took one sob to slip through his mouth for everything to come crashing down. Tears come rushing down his face as his body shakes violently with each body-heaving sob. His breathing hitches in ugly ways, barely making it past his cries. His throat goes from letting him wail freely to causing him to choke on nothing, making his crying sound even more broken.

His walls are broken.

He just wanted to go home. He just wanted to do what he had to do and go home. Why is life being mean to him? Why couldn’t he succeed?

His members look on at the scene with wide eyes and broken hearts. What in the world could have caused Mark to break down like this? What do they do?

Jackson is the first one to move, not having a thought in his head but only acting on instinct.

He goes over to Mark, gets down to the ground, and pulls the older into his arms. He holds Mark as securely as he can as the elder continues to cry his heart out.

The action gets the others into motion.

Yugyeom, Youngjae, and BamBam leave the room to go grab tissues and water for Mark. Jinyoung and Jaebeom go on the other side of Mark and just sit on the floor near him. They put themselves in his line of sight so if by any chance he tries to look past his tears, he can see that they’re right there next to him.

Jackson tries to soothe Mark by rubbing his back consolingly and whispering soft comforts to the elder.

“Yi-en, can you hear me? It’s going to be alright, We’re here. We’re here for you,” he whispers in Mandarin.

Then he whispers it in Korean. And then in English. He switches between the three languages, letting Mark hear it in whichever he can process right now.

The three youngest come back in the room with the items and join the others on the floor. They wait patiently, ready at any given moment to wipe Mark’s tears and make sure he doesn’t become dehydrated.

It takes a while for Mark to stop crying. His eyes ran out of tears which gave him a chance to try and breathe. His body still trembled and his eyes were far out but at least he wasn’t crying.

Jackson took the liberty of taking deep breaths, encouraging Mark with gentle movements to copy his breathing. Mark eventually does so, trying his best to mimic Jackson’s breathing.

While Jackson did that, the two youngests took it as their chance to help clean Mark up. BamBam dried the tears that were still on Mark’s face—Yugyeom holding the box of tissues for him. 

It’s not until Mark’s breathing is completely even and he isn’t trembling so hard does Jaebeom tries to get Mark’s focus.

“Mark hyung? Hyung, can you see me?” He says, making a small wave gesture in front of Mark’s eyes.

They watch as Mark’s spaced-out eyes finally focus in on something as he looks to Jaebeom.

He nods very slowly.

“Good, that’s good. You’re doing great. Do you need anything?” Jaebeom says.

Mark nods again in the same slow fashion. Even his blinking is slow.

“I wa—” he clears his throat, though it won’t really get rid of the strain he just put on his vocal cords, “I want to go home.”

It comes out rough and scratchy but they understood what he was saying.

“You want to go home?” Jaebeom asks just to make sure.

Mark nods.

“Your home here or your home in America?” BamBam asks, trying to see if Mark was feeling extremely homesick.

“Here. I want to go home here,” Mark responds.

Okay, so that’s good because they can take him home here without any problem. It’s kinda bad though because they still don’t know why he was crying.

“Alright, we’ll take you home,” Jaebeom says.

He turns to the other members.

“Jackson, Jinyoung, and I will take him back. The three of you go get food for tonight,” he tells them.

They all nod and get up. Once again, the three youngests are out of the room, off to go get Mark’s favorite foods and desserts.

Jaebeom and Jinyoung stand up, going to go grab theirs, Jackson’s, and Mark’s stuff. They’ll carry it back to Mark’s house.

Jackson looks at Mark.

“Is it okay if I pick you up?” He asks.

Mark nods, too physically tired to think against it. Now that his body is calm, exhaustion from all of that hits him and he wants to sleep. He doesn’t even think he could stand up on his own.

Jackson makes sure he gets a good hold on Mark before standing up with the older. It’s a bit of a challenge—Mark’s body feels like dead weight right now—but Jackson succeeds. He adjusts his hold to make sure Mark doesn’t fall.

“Come on, let’s go. I’ll drive back,” Jinyoung says.

They leave the practice room together, not stopping for any reason on their way out of the building.

Jackson looks down at Mark and sees that the older has closed his eyes and seems to be drifting off. He cried himself tired.

He looks back up to Jaebeom and Jinyoung and all three of them share a look.

They don’t know what’s wrong with Mark but they’re going to do everything they can to make sure he feels better. When he’s ready to talk then they’ll ask him questions but until then, it’s only about comforting him. 

Mark always looks out for them, making sure things are good. He always does what he can to make them feel better when they’re down and always stay by their side when they need it most. He always takes care of them. Now it’s their turn.

This time, they’re going to take care of their eldest.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed it. Kudo, comment, or whatever else to let me know, please.
> 
> Say hi to me on [Twitter](https://twitter.com/EVXinav)
> 
> Or ask me something [Curious Cat](https://curiouscat.me/EvXina)


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